Teach me to dance, will you?
Dance?
Did you say, DANCE?

Come on, my boy.

Those good old days in the dark...Mompelaar (Mumbler) (2007)

閉閉閉閉閉

αντίο, Theo Angelopoulos (1935 - 2012)

02:03:02 I have asked you one day: "How long will tomorrow last?"
02:03:07 and you answered to me:
02:03:11 Eternity and a day.
02:03:17 I couldn't hear you.
02:03:20 What did you say?

Hanna Mattes{[即係荷索同Eva Mattes(亦即係Petra von Kant個女Gabriele von Kant)個女][亦亦即係Gerrit Rietveld的校友]}

哦~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lucifer Rising

二零一一年的戲

一年將至，大概總結是每年例事。看的電影不多，而想過不作排名。雖說看的不多，但看的就重質不重量了。二零一一年，彷彿從在故人裡搬走後的十一月才正式開始。沒有Film of the Year，只有很愛的一堆重複的電影情節和散落的絮語：

是和Kenji看的Věra Chytilová的Sedmikrásky(1966) 標誌著捷克新浪潮裡Nová Vlna的其中一套重要的電影。在他家裡，其實絕大部份時候都是Stoned著的，還有突然走了去泡熱水澡，脈搏放慢再以熱水沸騰的體驗，東南地北東扯西倒一餐，聽著Sigur Rós時大家都聽到半昏迷。作為一個朋友來說，我很喜歡Ken的，因為他給我看見真實的世界裡有很多事情都很超現實，而在超現實裡我反而找到世界本質的現實。

§

還有還有，在網上聲稱在九十年代的美國找不上，所謂的禁片La belle verte(1996)，片裡沒有裸露，也沒有暴力，更加沒有鬼。有的，是來自有著先進文明和平等，生活在完美和諧與自然景觀質樸的La Belle Verte裡異星人Mila，被派來到地球作「考古研究」。在La Belle Verte，人類的當代史卻是他們在星球裡的「考古學」，他們曾派過兩個人，其中一個是巴哈，另外一個是耶穌(片中Mila很驚怕地地看見他竟然被人釘死在十字架上，哈!)本片透過Mila諷刺當代社會(資本主義之下衍生的社會不公平、消費主義、種族主義、「金錢」帶來的問題、在工業革命後更是雪上加霜、大眾傳媒的洗腦、學院與文化框框的操縱、大城市裡人與人之間的疏離、食水和糧食問題)從而帶出Simple Life的信息，如其是一套戲劇，不如說幾近是我們的現處的現實與真相。很多Blog上寫著 "La Belle Verte" movie was prohibited and neglected within all EU." 

雖然此片有少少(不只少少，其實都幾)New Age，也有少少的「娘」，但這是一家大細合家歡的電影，大人看完會有所反思，小朋友也看得開心。有時，電影要麼就要像Béla Tarr，要麼就要像小王子嘛。我這次卻選了Utopian thinking 裡的"Art is for everyone"的後者，打死罷就吧。

此片並沒有發行DVD，全片就可以在YouTube裡看到了。世界上所有的愈禁就愈多人要看。一齣很法國很法國的諷刺劇。其中很深刻的一段是當男人去拯救一段死去的婚姻，女人臨走了前被從La Belle Verte來的異星人Mila問到所有很簡單而艱澀的問題：

- Can I ask you for something?

- Yes, what?

- I'm sorry, but can I see what is in your bag here?

- In my bag? Yes, of course.

- Because I really wonder what you carry in it.
- Oh, not a problem.

- This, it's to open houses, right?
- And what is this thing for?

- It's a red lipstick.

- Oh? And what is it for?

- It's to put it on lips. Like that.

- Oh yeh? On Lips?

- Is it a medicament?

- No, it's not a medicine, it's to be pretty.

- To be pretty?

- Te be sexy.

- Sexy?

- Yes, to be attractive.

- Oh, to whom?

- To everybody.

- It must be difficult to do this.

- So that they love you.

- Oh, I see. It's kind of medicine so that everybody loves you, is that right?

- Yeah, but no, it's not quite that.

- And if you don't put it on, nobody will love you, that's right?

- Yes, but…

- It's difficult to explain…

- Is it what I said? I hurt you?

- No no, it's nothing, it's…nothing.

- And this?

- The photographs.

- This is Max, my parents and the children

- I see, it's people who you love, is that right?

- But then why don't they have a lipstick on their lips?

去到這裡我哭了。

§

我對所有在出生年的東西充滿著情意結，不能不提的是和安德雷斯在巴黎看的The Believable Truth(1989)。Hal Hartley寫的對白為此可以溫柔地強暴我，那夜，亦是我在巴黎的最後一夜，我和安德雷斯喋喋不休地重複著Robert John Burke和Adrienne Shelly又苦澀又甜蜜的對白。一九八九年，他們倆都曾經美麗年輕過，而到最後他們倆都早死：

- I know what you need.

- Excuse me?

- You need a woman.

- Oh?

- That girl is crazy.

- I know but I like her.

- Yeah, but she's leaving town.

- So I've heard.

- So come on, what do you say? I know what you need.

- Excuse me.

- You need a woman.

- Oh.

- That girl is crazy.

- I know but I like her.

- But she's leaving town.

- So I've heard.
- So come on, what do you say? I know what you need.

- Excuse me.

- That girl is crazy.

-
-
-

§

還有在Poznań看的Rabbit à la Berlin(2009)，(對，在波蘭裡看紀錄德國的波蘭紀錄片) 講的是分隔東德與西德的柏林圍牆之間的沒人地帶的野兔子們的一齣紀錄片，牠們寄生於時間，隨著歷史風光過，失落過。

在豆瓣裡的簡介寫得很好的，喜歡的可以一讀：

多少世紀以來，野兔在歐洲各地繁衍生息。第二次世界大戰結束後，因糧食匱乏，柏林市民在已化為廢墟的波茨坦廣場上，僻地開田，種植菜蔬果腹，於是很多飢腸轆轆的野兔，也都來這裡，伺機飽餐一頓。
但是忽然有一天，菜田被鐵絲網圍了起來，周圍砌起了磚牆。人們大呼小叫，爭先恐後地逃亡。不知過了幾天，當一切沉靜下來，野兔們提心吊膽地走出巢穴一看，發現自己被圍困在兩堵高牆之間了。
沒有外敵危害的高牆之間，成了野兔們的樂園，它們希望的東西，這裡應有盡有，很快樂園里便人丁興旺。樂園的締造者們，對自己的成就非常自豪，邀請各國來賓到此觀摩。
但有極少數的兔子，開始在牆角下挖掘通道，跑去西方世界覓食。這下激怒了樂園的締造者，下令手下士兵撒毒除草，射殺野兔。從此野兔們只得藏身匿跡，在恐怖中度日。
正當兔子們認為，苦難的日子似乎將永遠持續下去的時候，有一天，突然高牆在它們的眼前土崩瓦解了。
兔子們又恢復了往日的好奇心，紛紛奔向西方的土地。然而，自由的代價是昂貴的，等待著它們的，是各式各樣的外敵和困難……

§

還有呢？是Drive (2011)裡懶型的Ryan Gosling嗎還在Fracture (2007)扮得很假的律師？不了，我只記得Drive的Soundtrack很好聽。

Frontier Blues(2009)？還是一看再看的Taste Of Cherry(1997) 和永世都看不完的Ten(2002)，還是瞎打誤撞之了入錯了影院錯過了開頭的五分鐘的的Certified Copy(2010)？我只記得到電影散場的時候Kiarostami的名字出現的時候，彷彿一切都合乎情理了。

再有Angelopoulos的永恆的一天？還有閒時夜裡寂寞時用手風琴摸著亂彈著Eleni Karaindrou為此片作的音樂，我卻亂彈著片子最後的"Eternity Theme"

§

我的腦裡的一幕幕是一斷斷的流動的Flux，它們隨時間波動，聚焦，溜走。如果我記得，我會再補上，但我就在這裡告一段落了。但至少，我現在覺得很開心，我覺得很高興，因為作家寫作時應該覺得高興。(當作家寫得精彩，或者自以為寫得精彩的時候。)

在快將降臨的二零一二年，我 將會多寫一點。為著寫作的之名。好像Wittgenstein在Tractatus Logico-Philosophicus(1922)的前言所寫 - "Its purpose would be achieved if it gave pleasure to one person who read and understood it." 如果我寫的東西可以令讀者明白和為其帶來歡愉，這就是我最終的目的了。

Pourquoi nier l’évidence nécessité de la mémoire?

Quotes from "Ma Mere"

No use regretting it. But you're for young. Too close to the time you prayed. I'm exactly how you saw me, that's how I want to remain in your eyes. We must refuse together the world of those patiently waiting, for death to enlighten them. Her ass makes me realised I never really loved God. I like the idea of being abondoned by God. I was reciting catechism, that's all. God is something other than my old prayers. He's my way of losing my senses. By loving Hansi, I hope to slowly lose my senses. In a slow way, but not lifeless. You know. A choppy slowness. Choppy and scalp-tingling.

You never seemed to be waiting for me -- but we kept meeting at every time of the paths --- behind every bush, at the foot of each statue, near everypond it was as if there had been only you and I in all that garden.

---L'Année dernière à Marienbad

不要相信，只要妄想。在我記憶裡，的錯亂永遠都是清澈的。而關於疼痛淫的事，你要不要對我說呢？否定什麼，也認同什麼。在性虐待裡，施虐與受虐就好像一雙筷子，他們並列而坐，夾起慾望的種子，快慰地放進口腔的粘膜裡。喜歡給予別人痛苦，才得以獲得快感。或者，惟有經由別人的手，忍受著精神及肉體上的痛苦，身體在經受疼痛時釋放腦嗎啡，導致快感並上癮，這物質的釋放也是一些人自殘成癮的原因。在錯置的國度裡，一切都混合了侵略和征服；服從與降伏，妳和我，偷窺癖與暴露狂是相對而又雙雙存於同一個體內。我們這個世界，從來就被教育只有白與黑，男與女，信徒與異教徒等。那么虐待狂與被虐狂，偷窺癖與暴露狂呢？他們如何擺在這個二元對立的世界呢？是不是它們是例外，是不是它們就是隱疾，你就把它們分離？你就相信他們囚禁，就會變好癒合？這個情況，不就等同我們所謂「如果妳暴露，就是因為妳以為可以看見別人的性器。」一廂情願的誤信？而重心是，道德讓他們覺得羞恥，既厭惡，卻又不得不看，妳愛他，那個被羅馬人圍毆再以他自已的車輾斃的人，算不算病態？

C. Cotard says, "I will be dying and so will you, and so will everyone here. That's what I want to explore. We're all hurtling towards death, yet here we are for the moment, alive. Each of us knowing we're going to die, each of us secretly believing we won't,,,"

Untitled (Suomi)

Un film de Ka-man Lau
Musique de Sylvain Chaveau
"Pauvre Simon"

Un Hiver Décembre, Nyvarpet, Finlande
Adaptation Originale par l'Artiste

Dédié à Lotta, et à Peter l'Oiseau
Un merci spécial à le Greens de la Finlande